moooooooo

Is it actually competitive though?

Immortal Servitude is definitely good but I think Return to the Ranks will often be slightly more efficient, especially if you've stuck even a single creature to the battlefield.

This deck would be absolutely crushed by any decent modern deck. If you'd like to try to improve it, you'd need to look far outside of cards that are or were recently in standard.

Tainted Field is a good budget land I just discovered.

The deck's threats scale very well in my opinion. Champion of the Parish, Thalia's Lieutenant, and flipped Kytheon are massive issues for most decks if not dealt with immediately. Honor of the Pure can also buff your whole board. Even if your opponent is threatening to stabilize, the evasion from Brave the Elements is often enough to get the killing blow in. Knight-Errant granting flying would be nice, but I think the 4 cmc makes it unplayable. The deck relies too much on quick starts. Some of the 4 cmc walkers are definitely good sideboard options for attrition decks, but they would fill the slots Return to the Ranks and Ranger of Eos are currently in. The list as shown outperformed in our testing, so I think we are satisfied with it for now. Thanks again for the suggestions.

Thanks for the feedback. I will agree with you that the two cards you named are substantially weaker than the rest of the deck, but I don't like your suggested cards any better. Boros Elite is inherently very greedy, and significantly slows your clock against any deck with a T1 bolt. Consul's Lieutenant is another payoff card that is very strong goldfishing, but much weaker against any interaction. My friend and I were also considering Accorder Paladin which would play a nearly identical role, but decided against it for similar reasons. We've just made a few more changes to the deck, take a look and let me know what you think.

I just noticed: Mana Monkey doesn't make any sense. They may as well be additional lands. 1 basic is probably a good idea anyway though, since it's quite likely you'll run into Path.

Gitaxian Probe has recently been banned in Modern.

This is a very all-in combo deck; you don't really have room for cute stuff like Mutagenic. Also, put Darksteel Citadel back in. It may violate your landless theme, but it's quite good here. Rename the deck to "4 Land Affinity" if people are going to get bothered by it.

tl;dr

"Haha I did it again! I made fun of the US! EPIC LULz EPIC LULZ"

Honestly can we instate an age requirement for this site?

Lambholt is 3x the mana cost.

Are you morally against running 4x nonlands or something?
Champion of the Parish is by far one of the best cards in the deck, you should probably run 4 of it.

If you honestly care about how many likes your decks get you need a fucking job.

Voice isn't legendary. It's just so good it seems like it.

Cheers .

Waifu typically refers to a relationship someone has with a fictional character. It has a very specific connotation, much removed from being just a synonym for wife.

That aside, nice deck. You're missing a few no-brainer staples like Path to Exile, Advent of the Wurm, and Sundering Growth. Other than that, looks fairly solid.

Thanks for posting. Your ideas on Doran inspired me to start playing it quite a bit.
I've playtested your deck with and without some changes to it and I've come to the conclusion it's too optimistic for a few reasons.

Slagwurm is slow and risky. 3 colorless to equip is already a problem because you aren't doing anything else that turn unless you have 5 mana, but the real issue is that it doesn't give trample. 11 combat damage is easily chumped. Yes, with trample it's still very strong. But you are relying on one of three primal rages or a Nylea to be already on the field. It makes the deck unnecessarily combo-y. It's particularly frustrating when you draw into two primal rages. That trample you are so worried about to make your Slagwurm useful just cost you a card. I believe it's a mistake to run many of what I like to call "rich-richer" cards. The idea is you don't want a bunch of cards that give you a significant advantage when you're already in a good position. Trostani, Sapling, and especially Timber, and Nylea all fit into this category. Not only do these cards set your mana curve needlessly high, but they do very little unless you have access lots of other good cards. If you're already having a great game, you don't need a bunch of overkill cards that dominate your opponent. What you should be worried about is the cards that help you out in a game that could swing in either direction. And there were many times with your deck I needed something big to get me out of trouble and I drew a primal rage. At that point, the game is basically over. I am considering runnning *maybe* one, but I'm not sure it's even necessary when Vines of Vastwood does the job instead. Even better, it protects Doran from removal at the same time. Which brings me to my next point: you need some way to protect Doran at instant speed. Eland Umbra doubles as a way to prevent kill spells and a nice damage bonus, but it doesn't do anything for non-destroy removal (path to exile). And I can tell you, there is a TON of path to exile out there. Ready and Willing is a very nice card that can help out a lot, but it's only really powerful against aggro decks.. decks you are strong against anyway. It does nothing against control or combo decks. That's a problem because that's the hard matchups. You have nothing against these types of decks. In fact, you have zero card interaction with your opponent's side of the field. Your opponent can play whatever she wants and you are helpless to it. A terrible mistake in such an aggressive format as modern.

All in all your deck was a terrific starting point for my testing. I think I've made improvements but I'm still not done experimenting with it.
http://www.mtgvault.com/moooooooo/decks/doran-smashers/
Let me know what you think.

I like this deck but I think you should consider these cards which I think are essential for Doran decks:
Nyx-Fleece Ram
Tower Defense
Spellskite
Abrupt Decay
Vines of Vastwood

This deck is also naive in many respects.
It offers zero methods of protecting Doran and, aside from four paths, has no disruption. It's almost a guaranteed loss against a combo deck and almost a guaranteed loss against control. I'm sure your army of 0/4s will look very scary when Doran is struggling to stay on the field against Hero's Downfall, Abrupt Decay, and Path to Exile, etc. Even two burn spells would do the trick and trust me, people will try to lightning bolt Doran all the time. Especially when you are throwing down a bunch of 1drops and they can see you have no cards in hand.

I'm sure it functions well as a rush deck against aggro but to me it just seems like an inferior version of Red Deck Wins.

I've recently become really interested in this deck so take a look at mine and tell me what you think.
http://www.mtgvault.com/moooooooo/decks/doran-smashers/

It's still very much a work in progress, undergoing many changing in just the last few hours, but I think I'm getting close to something competitive.

I have a very similiar modern deck
http://www.mtgvault.com/moooooooo/decks/simic-draw-card-spam/

A few major discoveries I had in building and playtesting it:
-Hexproof is critical. Yes, Chasms have the nice islandwalk squid thing going on but that relies on them to *die*. You don't know pain until you have a 15/15 Chasm Skulking exiled. It means instant loss in a deck so reliant on one creature. Run 4 Simic charms and you'll still deal with this problem.
-Horizon Chimeras are expensive and usually the lifegain is too slow to even help. It took me a while to pick up on it, but they were practically dead cards 90% of the time so I finally cut them from my deck.
-When you have one giant creature, it's usually a struggle to actually attack. Against any deck with some creatures, your Chasm will be chump-blocked and then they'll swing everything else while it's tapped. I attempt to address this with Fling and Favor of the Overbeing in my deck. Your deck apparently relies on one of two Thassa's for unblockable. While Thassa definitely works here, you're going to need more than that-- running four of her would be an improvement to start off with.