The Seismic Bitchslap

by ManekiTora on 26 August 2009

Main Deck (60 cards)

Sideboard (15 cards)

Creatures (6)


Sorceries (4)

Instants (5)

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Deck Description

Enchantress Combo Deck w/ Seismic Assault as the kill. See if you can figure it out. 3rd turn kill. Sideboard is anti-counter and has second sunrise for wrath effects. Vitalize, Banefire, and Overrun are other win conditions you can put in for games 2 and 3 to mess with your opponents post-sideboard.

Deck Tags

  • Combo

Deck at a Glance

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Mana Curve

Mana Symbol Occurrence

000842

Card Legality

  • Not Legal in Standard
  • Not Legal in Modern
  • Legal in Vintage
  • Legal in Legacy

Deck discussion for The Seismic Bitchslap

Nice combo but you have a few issues.
Seismic Assault + Groundskeeper was obviously the combo you were talking about, but if they're the crucial part of your plan, why do you only have 2 seismic assaults and only 1 groundskeeper? If an opponent kills your 1 groundskeeper, you can no longer do your combo. Not only that, but the chances of drawing both of them has dropped dramatically. And even under perfect circumstances, theres no way this is a 3 turn win.
Turn 1: You play Karplusan Forest. You tap it to play Groundskeeper.
Turn 2: You play another Karplusan Forest. You tap it to play Skyshroud Elf. You tap Skyshroud Elf to play wild growth on one of your Karplusan Forests.
Turn 3: You play a forest. You tap your Karplusan Forests and your Skyshroud elf to play Seismic Assault. You discard a card using it. You tap your forest and use your other 1 mana from Wild Growth to bring the land back to your hand, then you discard it again with Seismic Assault. You are out of mana to use Groundkeeper's ablitty, and you have only done 4 damage.

That was the absolute ideal situation for your deck as well. The chance of you getting an opening hand that perfect are astronomically low. Even worse, you only have 6 cards in your entire deck that can produce red mana, and you need 3 red mana just to play Seismic Assault. Add in some mountains, maybe a few mana cylixs, and definitly more copies of seismic and skyshroud. Take out cards like Mass Hysteria which are completely useless to you, and your deck should improve.

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Posted 26 August 2009 at 16:54

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Okay, the guy that wrote all that really isn't that bright. This deck draws it's entire library all in 1 turn. Groundskeeper really isn't even necessary, it's just a contingency plan. When you draw your entire library you, of course, have 10 lands to ditch to Seismic Assault for the kill. By using your first 2 turns to set up mana production and hitting your Mass Hysteria, Aluren, Preist of Titania's, and Gaea's Cradles at the right time it is possible to combo out on the 3rd turn (I've done it). The real combo here is Enchantresses + Enchantments. As far as the red mana production is concerned, just take a look at skyshroud elf. He gives you all the red and white mana you could ever want as long as he is in play. Also, Mass Hysteria is most definately needed in the deck so that your Preists and other mana producers can produce mana as soon as they hit play with Aluren. Sorry setharoth, you were way off.

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Posted 27 August 2009 at 17:03

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Ha ha ha ha! Brutal.

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Posted 28 August 2009 at 18:33

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